Single Parent Dating : Finding a Balence
SingleDad wants to help you understand Single Parent Dating from a man’s perspective. How To Date a Divorced Dad is the Q&A Single Parent Dating Advice section on SingleDad. Our topic today is to find the balance between our dating relationships and co-parenting relationship.
Dear SingleDad,
I am newly single (about 8 months), I have a son and a daughter with my ex, and about 2 months ago I started seeing someone new. It seems my ex is doing everything she can to make everything harder than it needs to be. She doesn’t follow our schedule – not letting me see the kids or not telling me ahead of time when to pick them up from school or activities! I can only assume it’s about my new relationship, but my ex won’t even take a chance on meeting my new partner.
-Bradley, 34
Ending a relationship is hard enough, getting back into dating can be tough, and unfortunately it sounds like your two children are put in the middle of your ex’s behavior. If your ex started acting this way after you got involved with this new partner, then I agree, that may be the reason.
•Communication
Although it sounds like communication is already something you attempt with your ex, keep communicating! It’s inevitable – she’s the mother of your children. You’re still a unit for those two. She may be guarded or defensive because she’s hurt, so you could find different ways to communicate and how you say things. “It’s not what you say, it’s how you say it.” Maybe even writing her a letter, telling her how you feel, and the negative behavior she has is unacceptable will give her time to truly process what you’re saying. Allow her to express herself as well. Maybe there’s more to why she’s acting the way she is.
•No Pushing
Don’t force your children, your ex, or your current partner to meet one another. After all, you’re still getting to know one another! With all of these emotions that seem to be going on, there’s times those emotions just need to be felt and processed.
•Legal Issues
If you and your ex have a legal agreement in place about who sees the kids and when that is a must to follow. If she’s going against that, that is something to speak with your lawyer about. If you two don’t have a legal agreement to go off of, it may be best to look into a legal agreement. Only if there is absolutely no progress between you two and you feel it could help the children keep you both in their lives in a positive light.
Are You Dating a Divorced Dad? Ask SingleDad
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