SingleDad wants to help you understand Single Parent Dating from a Man’s perspective. This month, a member asks for advice on dating a fat woman. Ask SingleDad is the Single Parent Dating Advice section for the Divorced Dad. Read more.
Ask SingleDad: Dating a Fat Woman
SingleDad wants to help you
understand Single Parent Dating from a Man’s perspective. This month, a member
asks for advice on dating a fat woman.
Ask SingleDad is the Single Parent Dating Advice section for the
Divorced Dad. Read more.
My name is Eddie and I am a 38-year old Divorced Dad living
in Fresno California. I have two sons, ages 3 and 5. I just passed my one -year
anniversary of being a single parent and now I am ready to date. I recently
joined a couple dating sites and found that none of them (Match or E-Harmony)
know how to relate to my dating needs as a Single Parent Dating. I am doing the
best I can and being as honest as possible screening out the wrong women in my
life. I am looking for a good, honest woman.
A woman recently selected me and we began the process of
emailing, texting and calling each other. Her name is Sandra and she is a
Single Mom with a 3-year old daughter who live about 5 miles away from me. We are both balancing our kids,
household and careers and have had a heck of a time getting a date on our
Our date finally happened last week and that’s why I am here
posting my scenario. You see, Sandra is a little bit on the heavy side. I was
unable to detect the normal signs of a bigger woman and it didn’t show up on
any of her profile pictures. Now, by all means, I am no Channing Tatum, but I
keep myself fit and in shape. This situation bothers me because I felt awkward
during our date and I don’t know if Sandra could sense my feelings of
awkwardness. What made things worse was at the end of our evening, Sandra asked
me out again and I was unable to give her a clear answer. I felt horrible.
I’m Dating a Fat Girl
The bottom line is this: I like Sandra and I have more in
common with her than any woman that I have ever met. I am being stick with her
weight issues and I don’t know how to address my feelings about this. She has
just sent me a follow up invite on her email and I have yet to respond to her.
Can you please give me some advice?
Let me start off by saying, "Slow down, take a deep breath".
I understand your dilemma and like the video that I just posted from the TV
Show, LOUIE; you got to understand what you might be doing more wrong right
now. First off, the last thing you ever want to say to an over-weight woman is
to tell her that she’s "not fat". Woman who you describe like Sandra are often
insulted when you try to diffuse the situation. Just be yourself and relax Ed;
she is not embarrassed and neither should you be.
There is a reason why you are having a dilemma and I think
that you already know that you see a woman that you love from the "inside-out".
Your love for her is measured beyond the outside package and you see a loving,
caring woman that speaks your love language. Your relationship is still very
new and you need to invest the time into seeing where it goes between the two
As a Single Dad, I had my share of on-line dating and yes,
there were many times when the woman that I met looked nothing like her profile
pictures. The fact is, I bet a majority of my dates probably felt the same way
about me when it came to comparing me to the profile photo to the reality. Some
of my single parent dating were with heavy set women and I liked it. It did not
bother me to know that my date was probably the same size and weight as me
because I was present with the woman and having a meaningful date. You got to
remember that some Single Moms have trouble losing weight after child birth and
struggle getting back to their weight before pregnancy.
What I am trying to say is that your relationship is way too
young to make a conclusion right now. I am grateful that
you wrote our website to ask about your situation, however, this also tells me
that you are genuinely interested in Sandra. Reply back to her email and say,
"Yes" and go on a few more dates to see how things work out.
Keep Me posted and don’t be a
Are You Dating a Divorced Dad? Ask SingleDad
SingleDad wants to help you understand Single Parent Dating
from a Man’s perspective. If you are a Single Woman dating a divorced dad and
have a question, or a Divorced Dad seeking dating advice, send us an email
to: Dating@SingleDad.com Your
question will be posted to our readers and we will maintain your privacy.
Richard “RJ” Jaramillo, is the Founder of SingleDad.com,
a website and social media resource dedicated to single parenting and specifically for the newly divorced, re-married, widowed and single Father with children.
RJ is self employed, entrepreneur living in San Diego and a father of three children. The mission of SingleDad is to help the community of Single Parents
“Make Life Happen…Again!”