How To Be a Better Dad: Mindfulness
How To Be a Better Dad is the fatherhood and co-parenting section on SingleDad. Share and exchange great fatherhood advice from our members who are in all stages of fatherhood. In this article we’re going to discuss how our opinions and beliefs impact our children.
Dear SingleDad,
I have one son who is 7 years old. This election got me thinking how my opinions and beliefs can mold my son. He’s also in public school so he has other outside influence. I don’t want him to worry about adult things (like the election) at his age or believe something because I do. How do I protect my son from that and teach him to find his own beliefs/opinions?
-Ryan, 36
It sounds like you are very mindful and learned children really are sponges! I agree that it is important to teach our children to create their own beliefs and have their own identity, without feeling shame. Today’s article will provide tips on how to do so!
- Acceptance
First thing that comes to mind is acceptance. Once our children are born we have a responsibility and duty to mold our children into the best people they can be. We all have our own ideas of what that includes. Parents have their own experiences, lessons, and life skills they want to teach their children, but can be so consumed forgetting their children are individuals. Individuals who have their own experiences, lessons, and life skills waiting for them. Accepting your child will find their own identity and learn things on their own is a must. Accepting them provides a safe environment that they can grow independently and find their own voice.
- Expectations
With acceptance, there are no expectations. Accepting your child as their own person who has their own voice, will rid of expectations you may have had for him/her. Expectations really only cause disappointment that is unnecessary.
- Questions And Answers
You said your son goes to public school which can be outside influence. That is correct, but anything can be outside influence. Influence is all around us, but having our own sense of self is what takes us on the path we choose. I imagine your son may bring up topics or questions he heard from peers, television, music, and so on. If he has a question like “Dad, why do you recycle?”, answer his question with facts, rather than your own opinion. Your son then can decide if that’s something that makes sense to him and how he feels about it. Putting your son on the spot as well and asking, “What do you think about…?”, creates a space for him to use his own thoughts and feelings.
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