How To Be a Better Dad is the Fatherhood and co-parenting section on SingleDad. Share and exchange great fatherhood advice from our members who are in all stages of fatherhood This month, learn about the future success of your kids even if they’re defiant….. Read more.
Don’t Despair if Your Kid is Defiant – Future Success
Awaits
Single dads…raise your hand if you have a kid who is often
disobedient and kind of a pain in the neck. C’mon, hands up!
Yes…many well-meaning parents, plenty of them single, have
kids who are not fond of staying in line and following all the rules. Are you
cracking the whip and your kids aren’t heeding your orders? Tired of
disobedience and insubordination? Do
your kids think they’re in charge – king or queen of the house? Are you tired
of all the constant haggling, negotiating, and arguing? Cheer up…there may be
an upside!
What could possible be an upside to an unruly child, you
ask?
A recent study in the Journal of Developmental
Psychology may give you some hope and
cause for relief. Researchers in the U.S., Luxembourg, and Berlin tracked 745
kids from ages 12 to 52. What they found was that certain environmental factors
and personality traits in children lead to high salaries and good jobs as
adults. Here are a few that are key:
·Intelligence
·Parents’ socioeconomic status
·Years of education
·Being a responsible student
·Educational attainment (i.e., challenging themselves with
harder classes)
·Rule breaking and defiance of parental authority
Ok, the top five make sense, but it’s that sixth one that may offer some much needed hope to single dads and parents struggling with a kid who doesn’t like to hear the word “no.” Researchers were surprised to find that rule breaking and defiance of parental authority were predictors of better jobs and higher salaries later in life.
Ok, the top five make sense, but it’s that
sixth one that may offer some much needed hope to single dads and parents
struggling with a kid who doesn’t like to hear the word “no.” Researchers were
surprised to find that rule breaking and defiance of parental authority were
predictors of better jobs and higher salaries later in life.
Researchers speculate, and I concur, that
rule breaking and disobedience might mean that these kids are more competitive
and more willing to stand up for what they believe and what they want.
Researchers also discovered two traits that inhibit kids from achieving success
later in life – a sense of inferiority and a pessimistic attitude. However,
they did find that defiant pessimistic children did well.
These traits, as negative as they may seem
in adolescence, turn into a positive as they compete to make it in the real
world. They become more aggressive entrepreneurs, more competitive in the work
place, and more focused on achieving their goals.
Look at your own kids and what do you see.
Don’t despair if they are not perfect little angels, always doing exactly what
they are told. They may have a bright future ahead. If your kid is overly
confident, argumentative, stubborn, disobedient, and often downright defiant,
you may have a future CEO or billionaire entrepreneur on your hands!
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Richard “RJ” Jaramillo, is the Founder of SingleDad.com,
a website and social media resource dedicated to single parenting and specifically for the newly divorced, re-married, widowed and single Father with children.
RJ is self employed, entrepreneur living in San Diego and a father of three children. The mission of SingleDad is to help the community of Single Parents
“Make Life Happen…Again!”